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COME BACK MRS NOAH

1977 - 1978

Come Back Mrs Noah image



  1. Pilot
  2. In Orbit
  3. To The Rescue
  4. Who Goes Home?
  5. The Housing Problem
  6. The Last Chance




Gertrude Noah -
Mollie Sugden

Clive Cunliffe -
Ian Lavendar

Carstairs -
Donald Hewlitt

Fanshaw -
Michael Knowles

Garstang -
Joe Black



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Pilot

Gertrude Noah is the winner of a cookery competition and part of her prize is to see around the British deep space ship being readied for launch at Pontefract. Unfortunately, things go wrong during the tour and the ship blasts off with Gertrude, a reporter and some of the least useful crewmembers aboard.

This situation comedy starts off promisingly with a spoof on the popular BBC nightly news magazine show Nationwide (here called Farandwide) and some pretty decent gags. As soon as it moves over to events at the site of the launch, the laughs dry up completely and, despite the hysterics on the laughter track, there isn't a single laugh to be had after that.

The show instead seems content to play on the familiarity of the cast who are all playing parts very close to ones that made them popular. Molly Sugden was part of the immensely popular ARE YOU BEING SERVED and Ian Lavender's reporter is a slightly more competent reprise of his role from the equally popular DAD'S ARMY. Add to that Donald Hewlitt and Michael Knowles playing the exact same roles as they did in IT AIN'T HALF HOT MUM and there's not an ounce of invention between them.

To be fair to the performers, though, there really isn't any decent material to work with, so they fall back on what's served them well before.

The modelwork isn't half bad though.

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In Orbit

The castaways on Britannia 7 struggle with the simple tasks of eating and going to bed as Mission Control fails to get the rescue ship off the launch pad.

This painfully unfunny episode relies on a dreadful cardboard chicken prop and some inflatable plastic sleeping bags to attempt to wring some humour out of a script that is predictable, laugh-free and near racist a couple of times as well.

If this is what we have to look forward to then please stop it now.

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To The Rescue

The rescue shuttle is finally on the way, but the airlock seals are incomplete. The castaways will have to seal the shuttle into place manually, but understanding the process proves to be an issue for Mrs Noah.

Another completely laugh free episode in which the absolute worst demonstration of celestial mechanics proves to be tiresome and the inevitable double entendres about docking are more embarrassing than snigger inducing.

Is this really the best that can be done?

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Who Goes Home?

Due to damage caused to the rescue shuttle during docking, it can't take everyone home and so choices have to be made. An attempt to use a matter transporter is made by an artificial replica of Gertrude Noah.

Artificial copies and matter transportation ought to be able to provide some amusement, but here they are just used for more laboured and unfunny gags that even the relentless mugging of the cast cannot revivie.

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The Housing Problem

Since the castaways on the Britannia 7 are going to be in residence for some time, they move into the accommodation units which come with artificial gas fires and artificial servants.

The show stoops to new lows by having the robot maid strip to her underwear in the search for jokes. Sadly, even this desperate attempt falls completely flat and the half hour of the show displays time-stretching tendencies, making it feel more like half of eternity.

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The Last Chance

Mission Control have come up with a final plan to bring the reluctant crew of the Britannia 7 home. It involves firing the main drive for a brief instant and then using high altitude gliders to come back home. What could go wrong?

Only six episodes in and the jokes are being recycled, which would be fine if they were funny, but they're not and replacing eggs with jam doesn't make them any funnier. The cast continue to mug for all their worth, but nothing is going to save this.

The only thing that we can really say abou this show is don't COME BACK MRS NOAH.

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